I always find it interesting that when people oppose homosexual marriage, they say it's going to "destoy the family". I think this is a lie that Christians are perpetuating to make their opposition make more sense, and perhaps be more palitable, to the outside world.
In reality, homosexual marriage isn't gonna do a damn thing to traditional marriage. Tradition marriage is and always will be approved of by God. Whether the states endorses it or not, isn't gonna make any difference in heaven.
The most damaging thing homosexual marriage will do is raise the divorce percentage in the USA. Well, maybe not even that, since homosexuals are not that prolific and apparently there's a large number of them that aren't interested in marriage anyway. So if nothing else it'll look really weird and they'll get taxed more. (Yay for the government! :P)
What I see is that Christians are by-and-large ignoring the two biggest killers of marriage: adultry and divorce. Both of these things directly break one of the most important oaths made before God.
The average Christian will say adultry and (sometimes) divorce is wrong. Yet in the supposedly "Christian" community, divorce (I dunno about adultry) is commited just as much as the "pagans". That tells me Christians are only giving lip service to marriage and to God.
If organizations against homosexuality really cared about marriage, they would start by building strong marriages and trying to pass laws that encouraged strong marriages. They would go on huge campeigns and make it a social movement to start and promote healthy marriages.
But they don't.
I can only conclude that Christianity is suffering from a complex. We can't stand people sexually sinning because we do it so much ourselves! In an attempt to not have to deal with our own serious problems we go after other people and other things that really have nothing to do with us.
Let me summerize: When people say homosexuality--especially the marriage part--somehow threatens traditional marriage and families, it just goes to show how WEAK traditional family has become. Shame on all the Christians and people in the world who think of it that way!
Shame on Christians! Christians should be strong enough to simply admit that homosexuality is bad, and that endorsing it socially is a bad idea. And when people ask why, Christians better start coming up with better answers.
Oh yeah, and that whole thing about traditional marriage being around for ages, etc etc, and that's why it should be kept the way it is. Lets remember some things: For thousands of years polygomy was considered "traditional" marriage to. If we're gonna go by history we should start endorsing that too. Homosexuality has also been around for years (just read your Bible folks), and in some societies (like the Japanese) it was actually pretty well accepted. So if we're gonna go by history, homosexuality really isn't that odd or "bad".
I'm honest about why I don't like homosexuality: God calls it a sin. And just like all sins, we need to repent and turn to Christ. But it's no worse or greater a sin then people having sex when they're unwed.
I'm D2M and I approve of this Message!
7 comments:
Hi,
Saying that Christians are wrong about gay marrage undermining the institution of marrage because they don't say that divorce is wrong doesn't follow.
It may be, and I would argue it is the case, that both gay marriage and no-fault divorce undermine the institution of marriage.
In fact, as a Christian I think no-fault divorce is awful, and incredably damaging, both for the husband and wife, and especially for the kids.
I react similarly to you when this issue comes up, but bring a different conclusion: that we need to do something about no-fault divorce.
I don't think we can do much legally; it's too late for that and there is no going back. But, as you say, we should work to strengthen marriages, by offering counseling and marriage workshops and weekends to teach people how to have good marriages.
There are a lot of Christian organizations doing just that and many pastors of churches do counseling on the side helping people with their marriages. Focus on the Family (one of the very vocal groups about the gay marriage issue) does spend most of its time focusing on the family.
I don't think it's fair to say that Christians are ignoring adultry. It's still considered pretty bad. Most pastors and other people in ministry still have to step down if caught in it.
When people say that traditional marrage has been around for ages and ages, they usually mean that it's been around in the Western world for ages and ages. We've pretty much been polygomy free for about 2000+ years (there are a few exceptions). And gay relationships have never been equated with marriages in all of Western history.
It is true that Christians have a complex; probably lots of complexes. But that's not the primary reason for calling out something that we see as undermining the good in life. We do it because it's undermining what's good about life.
This is what Jesus did. This is what Jesus was talking about, how to have a really good life (the abundant life some people call it). He called out what undermined the good life. He said to have the good life we need to be in loving relationships with the people around us, and to be in a loving relationship with God. Anything that undermines that love is bad.
Divorce always makes life suck for everyone involved. It's not loving at all. People do it because "they don't love the person anymore". Sometimes it's the lesser of two evils, as in the case of an abusive spouse or a repeat adulter. But it's still evil. It's a black hole sucking the life out of everyone around it.
Unlike divorce gay relationships have bright sides. It's always good for people to love and care for each other. But they have their dark sides too. I've spent sometime on the fringes of the gay lifestyle through roomates, gay friends, etc. and without going into details it's a dark world for the most part, the gay world more so than the lesbian world. But both seemed pretty dark and painful to me. Some of that may no doubt because society is not more open and accepting toward them, but doesn't explain enough of it away; the pain was there first.
I'm opposed to gay marriage and no-fault divorce because: 1. I believe it's bad for society (all of us), and 2. I believe it's bad for the people invoved in it. My love for people and my love for life itself compells me to be against both. And to be in favor of healthy, loving relationships.
Congradulations on being the 1000th commenter on Max & Liz's blog.
Hey there! Nice to meet you!
Firstly, I wanna say that I'm not advocating homosexual marriage. I certainly don't think it will benifit society. Homosexuality itself is a perversion of sex And just like all perversions, anything based on them will do no good at all to society.
My point is that it's not really gonna destroy [traiditonal] marriage, because that is ALREADY being destroyed by divorce, adultry, etc. Again, it's not about whether homosexual marriage is bad or not, or whether it should be stopped, but that it is not destroying traiditonal marriage. That's been happening for years by something far more deadly. (Though luckily it has not succeeded!)
Thank you for your comments. I really enjoyed them!
I wish blogger had a way to let commentors know when they've been responded too... :-/
I don't know whether you care for a liberal's praise, but I admire the clearheadedness of this post. Certainly, we disagree on whether anything is wrong with homosexuality (and heterosexual premarital sex, for that matter), but you have things in perspective.
I really don't know if the government can make any significant moves on the social side to strengthen marriages. We can tinker a little on the economic side to deal with the financial stresses that poor families face, but often that isn't the problem. This is an issue where people have to take responsibility for their own situations. Men whose wives work should do an equal share of the housework and child care. Spouses should be kind to each other even when it's hard. (All I know about being married I learned by watching Mom & Dad, so take what I say with a grain of salt. They are pretty good at the marriage thing, though -- it's been about 30 years for them!)
D2M, I agree that we Christians have already damaged traditional marriage a lot by ourselves, yet I still (like you) want to preserve and strengthen it.
What do you think about the following argument (summarized)? The traditional family is the building block of society, and since Government is obligated to protect and govern the foundation of itself (ie. us), it should protect traditional marriage. This argument is not an issue of the homosexuality's moral problems, but rather a practical argument that promotes the basic self-interest of society. This argument does not seek to punish gays by denying "marriage" benefits, etc. Rather it seeks to affirm and promote the lifestyle that out society is built on.
Now, although I agree with the above argument, D2M, I heartily affirm that we as Christians need to be at the forefront in protecting our marriage from the inside--ie. not legislatively. If people understood the importance of marriage in and around their lives, we wouldn't have near as many problems. This is similiar to my view on social justice: yes, the state should (or inevitably will) be involved in aiding the poor/downtrodden/oppressed/etc., but Christians' generosity and love should be so great that the state has little to do in these areas.
I appreciate your blog! Any comments?
Seth, What type of things would you recommend the government do? I'm just curious to what you would suggest. :)
I also believe that Christians should be right in there "fighting" to promote marriage. While some churches do, as a whole, the church body does not. I was fortunate to have many good examples of marriage in my life, including my parents. But many people do not, and they NEED someone to teach them. And the whys and the hows of marriage need to be taught early too, not when they're 20+ and already set in their ways. :P
Yeah, the blogosphere is too fast for me. By the time I've reflected on someone's post and made my response no one is paying attention anymore.
D2M, I believe the government should reward and encourage strong heterosexual marriage. This may mean (better) tax breaks for married couples, more tax credit for children, making it harder to get married and harder to get divorced--that way people may think some more about either one.
Although the state should encourage marriage, in the end it's going to be Christians who make the difference to peoples' hearts. We should set examples of strong healthy marriages, and work to help each other learn the value and necessity of this God-ordained union--both to us individually and to society as a whole.
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