Confession

I'm quite embarrassed, I can even feel my skin burning (which is the closest I get to a blush). Today I discovered that Liz had read my rants on this very blog. This very one!

Ah...

...ah....

...I didn't want her to see the ugly side of me. It's not that I have a problem with being opinionated and just disagreeing. That's ok. But my rants were... angry, bitter, resentful. There was no love in them, none at all.

I value her as a friend, the best one I've had in years. I was afraid if she knew what I was thinking and feeling she'd not like me anymore, she'd think I was lowly and not worth her time. I also didn't want to hurt her... I didn't want all that frustration and anger to get unleashed on her. It didn't seem fair to do that to her, someone I liked so much.

But she says she's still my friend. Even when I'm angry and disagreeable. That's so rare to find in someone. A person who's willing to like you despite yourself. In women it's particularly hard, since we seem so critical of each other.

I feel like a dork saying it, but it's like... it makes me want to be her friend forever. I want us to still be in contact with each other when we're 60. Reminiscing about the good ol' days and laughing about how idiotic we were back then.

..hehe.. I'm such a dork.